Shameless in Hospital

Last December after bilateral mastectomy and breast reconstruction Copyright 2012


My last hospitalization, I notice my discomfort when interns, my oncologist, and internal medicine doctors asked to see my breasts. I knew, as I was there with fever, they wanted to know the cause of my infection. Maybe I had open wounds, maybe my incisions were swollen. Whatever. I knew my incisions looked okay, and who were they, anyway? They were not my plastic surgeon.

I remember Paul complaining to me last December how I flashed all girlfriends and female coworkers walking in the hospital room to show my newly reconstructed breasts. Someone walked in — I raised my top. Ha-ha. I asked first, of course, if my visitors wanted to see.
“…But you never waited for their response,” Paul said, “and I dread leaving your bedside for the fear that you will show your boobs to any male who happens to walk in.”
I thought it’s  funny that he was actually worried. But that was then, this is now. I feel uneasy showing my chest. Shameless, I am not anymore.


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